March 12, 2016

  • Spiritual Compatibility is HARD...and easy.

    I think one of my least favorite new date conversation topics is talking about religion. I like being a Christian, but I don't like playing a card game over one's faith choices. Most of the time, my faith and your faith will be different.

    And on the one hand, this can be hard. Some faith expressions are not compatible with each other. If my religion and your religion both say the other is going to hell, it's going to be hard to raise children in such a fraught environment. Right?

    But on the other hand...sometimes it feels like one gets overly concerned over matters of degree. Even if we believe the same thing, it is likely that one of us will be a "better" Christian than the other. More regular churchgoer, or more sacrificial, or spent 4 years helping needy children, you name it. So does that mean that a mismatch means incompatibility? It's true that it will create tension at first. But also, isn't it just common-sense that rarely will two people exactly match in faith? "Ok, babe, we can't get married until you up your Bible reading to 2 chapters a day, and also I'm going to need to see more tithing for 6 months." Heh, what do we really want out of the other person, you know?

    It's not easy, but also I kind of wonder if a lot of the spiritual compatibility debates have been overdone. Maybe it's not as complicated as we've made it.

     

Comments (1)

  • You're more active on the dating scene than me xD

    Oh gosh, I've been thinking about this for a very long time. #singlegirlproblems haha

    On Thursday, I met with my new pastor. He's trying to meet with the entire congregation to get to know them and hear from them about what they want for our church, etc. Anyway, I mentioned that I've felt very alone the last few years - I've been the only single person in the 18-40 age group, and the youngest in 95% of church events. It's a bit tough for me to make friends. My pastor agreed that it's a tough age group in the church, and that it's rare for men in that age group to attend church.

    So, on to talking a bit closer to your post's material (sorry for the rambling haha)...

    I've never really been in a relationship, let alone been on a date. I want to, and I'm not getting any younger. One thing I want is a Christian who is active in his faith. I want someone I can go to church with, then discuss the sermon, readings, etc afterward. I want someone who can challenge me in my faith, and maybe I can challenge him in his. We can both learn new things, together.

    I don't know what exactly would be spiritually compatible with me, but I want to explore and someday find that person. I know that I won't find someone who will perfectly match my beliefs, and I'm good with that.

    I first need to get over my awkward word-vomit when I meet new people and make myself not look too too much like a total fool and loser -__-

    Prayers that we can each find that special someone. :)

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