March 28, 2010

  • Cryptic Crack

     I decided to write little letters to 6 people from a certain web-site:

    1. You're really sweet, but girl, I bet guys would stop seeing you as only a sex object if you'd stop having sex with them. Another good one gone to waste, wish there were more to take your place.
    2. I can't believe I ended up being your wingman, you snake. Introducing you to her was a huge mistake and will forever be a dark shadow on my networking and hospitality skills. I'm glad you don't know where I am anymore.
    3. I never talked to you very long, and I know that bothered you. I didn't want to fall for you like everyone else did. Now you have a good boyfriend, and I can grin happily knowing I made the right decision.
    4. I had no idea such a pretty face could go unappreciated for so long. Perhaps you taught me too much, but now it's my responsibility to take what I learned from you and use it for good. Thanks for being so normal.
    5. You were my only friend there whom I really trusted, and then I found out I shouldn't have trusted you either. Now I wonder about all the mutual friends we had, and I feel like I let the fox hang out with the chickens.
    6. I was playing chess while you were playing checkers, but it doesn't matter if the judge thinks the game is Scrabble. I wasted a lot of time wondering why I wasn't winning more games, it's obvious to me now.

    Did you figure out which Xangans they were? Bad, because they weren't Xangans at all! I of course used another web-site from years past. And that's the trouble with cryptic pulses and tweets, updates that are about some "you" or "she" or "I" that remains unknown but sounds a lot like someone you know, or yourself. We don't have enough facts about a person's life, so we twist the cryptic words to fit what we know of them. Now, I like a little ambiguity myself, and sometimes it's better to give a 10 word pulse instead of explaining all the dreary details in a 1000 word post.

    But the problem is, cryptic writing is like crack. You start enjoying the hidden meanings too much, and the ability to leak secrets too terrible to enunciate on a page but just right for a line's worth of text. And pretty soon no one feels safe, because they might have been the subject of your last terse update, filled with drama, teeth, and an odd hint of garlic. (Wait, sorry, that's me--shouldn't have had the Fettucine Alfredo at lunch). But seriously, I'm going to do my best to avoid the temptation to be cryptic unless I have promised to keep something a secret, or if it's much better for everyone if true details are withheld. If you've seen my updates on some sites lately, you know that will be a challenge! But I commit. Begun, the wars have, and I will fight them. Oh wait, that's cryptic too (hangs head) this will be tough!

    Pick up a phone and call someone, or just say "My feelings are hurt, anyone around to talk?" instead of something like "Dark are the waters, and I knew not that your dolphin flippers hid the mouth of a shark." Ooh, wait, that sounded kind of good...AAAAAH! Ok, ok, I can do this. Quit writing so cryptically. Just be honest, or keep it to yourself. I have no idea if you're about to die or have some discomfort due to some bad pizza from lunch. Is the bad guy your boyfriend, your dad, or the mean Chipolte worker who wouldn't give you extra sauce? Sure, it might get more attention if you're cryptic, but you also might lose a friend forever if they realize you are talking about them or think you are. Is it truly worth it to run that risk just for a little literary license?

    I look forward to your thoughts on this one, what am I leaving out? Can being cryptic be healthy? Or does it bring in people who are part of the problem, not the solution?

Comments (36)

  • Well, being cryptic is sure better than keeping your emotions bottled in. I think it can be a healthy form of release, personally. 

  • Writing cryptically is a form of being passive aggressive, which is nauseating. But then again i can't say ive never been passive aggressive. =P

  • I don't know, man, the only way I managed to keep my site for so long was because I kept it cryptic. At the same time, I talked to the people who I needed to talk to openly. The two aren't mutually exclusive, I don't think.

  • I think being cryptic is silly then it doesn't let the right people know, and you can offend people who aren't even involved.

  • Im a huge fan of SAY WHAT YOU MEAN AND MEAN WHAT YOU SAY.

  • assumptions may very well be let out in the clear.

  • Cryptic... can make for many readers. :shrug: Depends on what you want... although, recently I tried being VERY blunt / open, and actually I got a lot of good responses... so... who knows, really.

  • I know I shouldn't, but this just really inspires me to write my own "cryptic" post. One about people none of you guys know ... ha. Really, I don't think it's healthy, it just prolongs our being mad about whatever it is we're mad about. And it's a form of attention-seeking - you know that people are going to get paranoid and start thinking it's about them; I've seen this many times, and cryptic writers do it to stir things up, it seems. It's pointless.

  • haha!!! I think being a little cryptic can be healthy! It let's you express yourself without giving out information or maybe hurting someone's feelings! But then again it can be misinterpreted. Oh well! Funny post, lol.

  • There's actually been a couple times I've been really hurt by a cryptic message that was written, and I clued in pretty quickly that it was referring to me. People seem to overestimate their ability to be subtle, or underestimate their reader's intuition. There's better ways to have a little drama and mystery in your life.

  • There are probably times when being cryptic is good.  Generally I think its probably better to try and be clear.

  • @lgb1987 - I agree...but why not instead unleash the full emotion into a private journal? Once I remembered that option, I feel like cryptic does indeed have less purpose.
    @Eternalimplosion - HA! Me neither, although I HATE being called passive-aggressive, ha. Quick way to tick me off.
    @Finity - Hmm, now perhaps that is a better idea. If, for example, I'm upset with someone who reads my Xanga, I can tell them so directly, and then say in my pulse something like "I hate it when people are not completely honest." But Finity...problem with that is, doesn't the person feel ganged up on then? It's like raising up a mob to insult the person who originally caused offense? Eh. I am not sure.
    @dlmcniel - Yeah, that's the problem right there--any time I try to be cryptic, I get three "Is it I, Greek?" responses. Meh.
    @PrettyKitten@datingish - Quite a few drama queens love being cryptic, but I can't judge them if I'm doing it too :-p
    @steph843 - The usual wisdom, Steph--and this is why I hassle you to post more often. You say some good things when you do talk on here.

  • @GreekPhysique - Depending on the situation, that may be the case. I suppose if you have a confrontation situation pending, it needs to be addressed with the person. However, if you have a negative experience in your life, there's nothing wrong with venting about it. My boyfriend and I have this problem sometimes, but we sort of ignore each other's angry blogs with a "touché" and just discuss our own issues. We both know when we need to vent and that we use our Xangas for it.

  • The goose has left her nest and the alligator is coated with teflon...

  • I like doing it, or playing fortune-teller with the honesty box application on facebook.
    Good post.

  • You are so right. It has to stop. I know i have vented in a pulse about offline frustrations later to find friends thinking it was about
    them:/ ive been unnecessarily concerned at times too :/. Great lesson here/topic for discussion

  • Greek,

    I write poetry so I'm always cryptic. Poetry is art though and seemingly no one ever understands it ... or pays attention to it. When someone starts writing cryptically as a form of attack instead of as an artistic expression then that's when I kind of get peeved. So, to the point, it is my opinion that if the message a person is trying to convey is something deeply personal and has a target audience then the message should be streamlined, not broadcast to the masses in hopes of sympathy from otherwise uninvolved onlookers. *shrugs* Just my opinion though.

    Hope all's well.

    Felicia Kolette

  • Here's the thing... I really hate cryptic status updates / tweets (not so much on pulses for the most part, because I don't know most of you in real life, so it doesn't really matter). BUT, I often find myself having the urge to write one... I've never actually done it, but I always want to.

    The reason I don't write them is because I don't want people to start making assuptions about me. I know how I make assumptions about people when they write such cryptic words, so I can only assume that other people do the same thing.

    Also... these cryptic words (particuarly on Facebook status updates) seem to be the start of a whole lot of drama (largely due to assumptions, I presume).

  • generally I'm vague because I'm venting about someone so that my friends can know how I'm feeling but I'm not saying "such-and-such did this to me and she's a terrible person."  I guess I feel like I'm keeping from gossiping that way.  Idk, when people are as famous as you I suppose I can see how it could be bad. :P

    Generally if I know that the person that I'm talking about is going to read my status I'm very careful in the way that I phrase things but I do not try to hide the fact that it is about them.

  • It can let you talk about something that's painful that you wouldn't otherwise, if everyone knew exactly who and what was involved; it can hold others at arm's length--removes the opportunity to pour salt in the wound, which some people do, knowingly or not. I have done this. Sometimes it even helps you forget. 

  • I tried to be cryptic when trying to express my real emotions and thoughts to certain people but I'm not good at it.

  • I only write something cryptic if who I'm writing it about KNOWS it's for them...and it's only meant to be cryptic to everyone else.  I'm too honest to play games.  If something is on my mind, I say it.  

  • 1. i like being cryptic because i don't want all of my 1,207 (the number is slowly going down) facebook friends to know all the details, but i feel like it's my right to be able to talk about it if i wish to. if you want to ask me about it, then i can choose to be detailed or not in my response.
    2. that being said, sometimes i get annoyed when people ask me about a cryptic post. that's wrong on my part, 'cause i obviously put it up there to get some sort of reaction.
    3. considering all your crypticisms are about me in some way and i already know that, you're going to confirm it to me, right? oh wait, i didn't know you before xanga. um... are ya gonna let us know who you're talking about? you're driving me crazy! hahaha.
    4. i give this post mad props. i liked it. it made me think. i know that when i comment i always give props, but this one really deserves them.

  • I'd rather say what I mean, than to hide it.  It's no way to live.

  • That Chipotle guy is a real asshole.

  • @zynverwex - Oh you and your curiosity. Message me/IM me and I'll tell you more, I suppose. And of COURSE everything I say is about you, Chandler, haha. Thanks so much for enjoying the post, though, you know how I love your comments, old Xanga friend

  • I miss you on XTV! You look adorable in the sweater pic.

  • hmmm.... thought provoking post! 

    when i'm cryptic, its usually because i'm trying to be careful of someone else's privacy. i dunno, maybe "healthy" is a middle ground? some details that shouldn't be aired to anyone and everyone, but if you are feeling strongly about something, you should probably put enough out there that it's harder to misinterpret at least a general sense of what in the world your referring to! as for other people being cryptic, i try and remember that it's just a human instinct to make everything about me when it's probably not!! i guess i think that if anyone is going to be cryptic, one should also be prepared to need to do a little explaining to involved parties later. unless they really want to stick to their guns and leave the world in confusion. and if that type of cryptic is a person's MO, i'll just be annoyed and say good riddance. :)  but all in all, i'd posit it has it's place, just handle with caution. 

  • Bravo for another interesting and applicable post.  Well done 

  • First off I would like to say that you are the most funniest person I know here on xanga. So thank you, I appreciate your humor.
     I think being cryptic allows the author to release themselves from emotional issues that help them to deal with reality in a non confrontational way. Although I do not suggest this approach to all situations and aspects of life but sometimes you have to use parables to get your point across...
    Yet, I deem being real and saying what you mean will resolve the greater issue depending on the circumstance.

  • Hey! I just posted a cryptic status on Facebook. They let me socially manipulate everyone. Its fun, too! :)

  • I think this is really thought provoking.  However, at this moment I can't really comment.  I think I'll have to come back to this one :)

  • I don't like when people read into my blogging. A lot of times when I write something cryptic, its because a). I don't want want the person to know or b). its not about anyone on here. But if someone assumes its about them, I'll usually just let it go, because it's too much work explaining it and probably frustrating them further... Its another reason to not get involved with anyone online. Then those misunderstandings can't happen!

  • haha...I definitely agree. I've been thinking about that a lot, lately. Trying to be more straight-forward, and more silent. They go hand in hand, sometimes.

  • @shatterFocus - Yeah...sometimes I realize that rather than release my cryptic poison, ha, I should just shut my mouth and log off my computer Hey, I appreciate you coming over here and reading like you said you would! Thank you

  • @AmeSoeur--hahahahaha!  Anyway, this is a good post.  99% of the time cryptic messages cause me serious eye rolling.  If it's not something you want everyone to know about then don't post it--cryptic posts scream, "I want attention!"  If you want people to know about it, then say it clearly so there isn't a misunderstanding.  Still, there is that 1% of the time ... also, 98% of statistics are made up on the spot.  Anyway, one thing I do love is the inside joke, which is equally obnoxious but I'm completely guilty of it.  I frequently make facebook postings aimed a person or group of people just because I know it will make them laugh.  So, I try to keep my irritation with cryptic posts to a private eye-rolling festival. 

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