January 18, 2011
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Are Bloggers Normal?
When I first came to Xanga, I was amazed to find out how many of my fellow citizens were truly struggling with fierce burdens. Blogger after blogger was confessing to eating disorders, being sexually assaulted, depression, and other major struggles. It amazed me how many normal-seeming people were hiding huge problems, and it was quite honestly a wonderful way for me to have more sympathy and caring for my fellow humans.
However, over time, I've started wondering. Does your average Xanga user, say the woman in college who writes about her day and life story and gets about 2 comments a post, represent the average person? Sometimes, given how dark a picture people paint, I really hope not. This place can be depressing, and on bad days, I don't come here, because I only become more depressed. If we're all really that messed up and broken, we're in bad shape. Or maybe, if we're all that messed up and broken, it is refreshing to realize that we all need each other and no one is perfect. I'm not sure.
Xanga, I have to ask, do you think your fellow Xangans are normal?* And no, don't think of weirdo attention-starved Top Bloggers, ha, think average Xangan.
*I admit this post sounds a lot like comment bait. I deliberately didn't use Xanga in the title to avoid full comment baitness, though. I haven't sold out (completely) yet!
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Comments (31)
Normal people don't exist. We've all got our probs and if the outside world doesn't care as much as Xangans do, I'm content with any support I can find so I can face the world and all the other people pretending they don't have anything bugging them.
I think so. I think the annonymity but community allows people to tell more than they would anywhere else.
I don't know. It's chicken and egg stuff. Are people bloggers because they're hurt and writing is good catharsis? Or are writers just generally hurting people? What comes first, the pain or the passion?
if being on xanga depresses you, you're reading the wrong people. or the front page. uh oh.
@The_Innocents_Corner - Right on.
Hmmm but define normal? Average? In what country? The US? The UK? Etc...?
Is the normal person happy? To be honest I think not. At least from my experience in life most people I have encountered are pretty miserable. That's why it's so great when you meet people who are genuinely kind and compassionate! I hold onto those people.
It's funny because for me I used Xanga as a way to be positive - to get away from negativity since we are already inundated. Most of my posts I try to focus on the positive. Occasionally I do serious blogs (though I try to be critically constructive) or a depressed blog - but I try not to dwell on it!
I think that a lot of people come to Xanga to vent their troubles (admittedly I'm one of those people), and thus the majority of the Xanga community ends up like you said, with eating disorders, suicidal, depressed, etc.
I think the normal people come here but what as others think normal is not the same as it is here. Like your said everyone has pasts that they just want someplace to release it. So normal people on Xanga. Sure why not.
Normal doesn't exist in real life. We all have some type of dysfunction- trust me I'm a psychologist
. The question should be is our issue large enough that we cannot cope through life with it? I'd think for many blogging can be a way to cope- a way to make sure we can function in life. In doing so we become normal.
i imagine xangans are about as normal as the rest of the world. just here people are more open.
and probably, not all of them are as depressed as their writing makes it seem. xanga can be a place to vent, so probably we only see the more dramatic side of people here.
Haha, sadly I think it is representative of the average person. It's just the thoughts that come out when the facade is allowed to fall at the end of the day and you're sitting alone at your computer. But it's not to say that only depressing things happen in the average blogger's life...I think a lot of people tend to only write about extremes - intense problems they're grappling with and struggles they're going through, or really exciting moments (which tend to be more rare or less acknowledged). I don't write about my every day and the small, positive things that happen along the way, so in my blog I come off as a lot more depressing than I am in real life. I guess it's probably similar to other "average" bloggers.
I think to a degree, like another commenter said, people use Xanga as a journaling medium and may appear darker or to have more problems simply because they write about everything. I know on another journaling site (rhymes with DiveJournal), I went through a ridiculous dark phase. Thankfully it's all water under the bridge now, but I really poured my heart out because of the relative anonymity of Internet strangers. Those people probably think I'm some crazy depressed person, but I'm really not. Sometimes it's an unintended consequence--you might want to post about both happy and sad moments, but it's easier to write out upset emotions than happy ones.
not sure if it's average, but i do think the relative anonymity allows most people to speak in a more frank and true way than they would in conversation. it's certainly true for me. i'd like to think i'm anything but average
but then again, i'm a female college student who writes about her day and life story, so perhaps the answer will be that i actually am average. how drab, i might have to spice things up a bit.
I think we're pretty normal. I think the internet makes it easy to self disclose, which is why people are more apt to write depressing stories about their lives. Disclosing these stories is also easy because they can disclose the stories to people they trust on an online community. Computer mediated communication is so different from face to face conversation because we have a screen. Our nonverbals -- other than what we have written -- are not visible (unless we do a videoblog). I think that blogging is a good emotional outlet.
I agree that a lot of people may use Xanga as an emotional outlet. The more normal people are on Facebook. Ha ha.
@kvdubs - Speaking of video blog...(loud throat clearing). Ha, remember when I used to pick on you about that? I think it is just a little frustrating that sometimes, I really start to worry about a friend, and turns out they exaggerated details and it wasn't that bad. Then I feel silly for caring. It sucks.
I don't think anyone is normal. I think most people have a secret life and secrets that don't admit to. Everyone. Look into my eyes and I will tell you your secrets.
I think they are absolutely normal. Some people like to hide their troubles, some people need to share them. The Bible tells us to share each others' burdens... it makes the load lighter and easier to bear. I think that is what Xanga does... makes the load a little lighter to bear.
I think a lot of people come out here to vent (like I do.) I also think that the creative juices tend to flow more when we're upset - so we're more likely to write when we have some high wave of emotion (hence, an increase in "drama.") So... am I depressed? Yes, actually. But I know that I am, and I'm working on it. So... do I think a lot of Xangans are depressed / struggle w/ serious issues? Yes, actually. We just chose this platform to vent our emotions... and so, we rather feed off of each other... which, is both horrible and wonderful. I know... that I found love through here (literally... I'm engaged to ro_ad808!) and also a whole lot of friends that I'm closer to than most people IRL. There's something to be said for that.
After working at an art studio for 8 months, I think I have the ability to say that Xanga is far more normal than you might think. Artists though... and a massive auditorium studio of them... are not.
Would anyone like me join for dinner tonight? We are having the usual coffee and cigarettes, everyone.
ah xanga. it started as an online diary where i can bitch and complain and noone can say anything to me. haha then i started writing about life thoughts then anything that was on my mind. i think i only use xanga to talk to someone, even if it's noone. sometimes if i tell a friend it's just a burden (especially among guys) so ya. great how there's a xanga "community" as well that helps so you can empathize with others or them with you.
I think everyone has issues, but only some people open up their vulnerabilities to the world.
I think we're all normal. Going by what you said since most of us here have all sorts of problems, having some disorder in our life is the norm on Xanga.
Normal is relative.
Everyone has problems and for most, even myself, the inspiration to write is driven by strong emotions, usually connected to awkward, difficult, hard, or negative feelings. However, I do try to write more positive posts, but it seems like the negative, the questioning, the ones fueled from my frustration seem to come out easier than the ones I have to sit and ponder.
What is "normal," really? Who is, really? I know I'm sure not! I've come to fully accept it, though, over time. :]
It depends on your definition of the term "normal."
For myself, Xanga is a platform used to share my true thoughts, opinions, feelings and complaints in a completely anonymous way. I may not post the most intellectually stimulating blogs, but I, like others, have my moments. Sometimes just "writing it out" can be therapeutic.
@AmeliaHart - Good point. I need to turn my Xanga and Xanga subs back into a place of encouragement, I feel.
@hollowhopes - Aww, too bad. I like reading about normal boring moments too!
@PepperPottsUSA - Oh my. I am glad you are calmer here on Xanga, then. Your DiveJournal self sounds scary, haha.
@la_solitaria - (reminds self not to look into your eyes...ha). I've run into a prophet or two in my time. I'm not sure I want to again.
@ShimmerBodyCream - Ha, FB isn't much better, now, people just are more fake there!
@mycontinuity - I prefer to stay mostly closed myself, I must say.
it seems you have been back for some time. i am a terrible xangastalker. lol
are bloggers normal? what's normal? i think it's great when a body writes regularly for whatever reason. whatever the skill level, the mental exercise can't hurt.
i think some are more well-adjusted to blogging than others, since their writing is sometimes a constructive emotional and creative outlet (that's why i do it) with not much thought given to attention, though it certainly isn't discouraged...just something to do at the end of the day to arrange and analyze one's thoughts, or simply to get an idea off of the chest and create some dialogue.
when blogging becomes an obsession and/or a stressor, then i think it isn't healthy, but people get into similar things all the time...it's not so much to with blogging as it is with thought processes; people who are "abnormal" and write about it vs. people who are "normal" and write about that.
at least they're communicating.
Everyone has problems. Anywho who claims not to is lying, and you just found part of their problem.
I think bloggers, maybe writers in general, are just more willing to share in this medium.
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