January 23, 2012

  • Extremes: Facebook Face is Pixel-Perfect

    Aren't you tired of all those perfect Facebook profiles? They never share bad news, it's just one promotion after baby after GREAT NIGHT OUT AT FANCY PLACE MY HUSBAND IS THE GREATEST update after another. And the photos--come on, even the photos that they pretend are awkward are "Ooh I didn't see the camera but oh coincidence! my hair's perfect!" time after time. What they really need is to get real, right? They need to be vulnerable. Or do they?

    Some of you are friends with me on Facebook, at least the ones that we still keep in touch. And quite frankly, my Facebook wall gets more boring each year. I basically talk about travel and link to various web-site articles, with the appropriate "I don't agree with everything in this article, but there's some good points in it!" intro affixed. The sad thing is...this blandness is rewarded. I don't have to fix arguments, and I don't have to put up with challenges. And I seem smart even though I just copy-paste stuff that cooler people than me wrote or found.

    Horrifyingly, in keeping with the theme of the extreme series...it makes sense to be pixel-perfect. I got annoyed when a friend told me to put up a more professional, handsome profile photo. But on the other hand, it is all about appearances, I'm afraid. It really is about seeming to have it all together. Are you truly rewarded for being vulnerable on your Facebook? Of posting photos of yourself with your prettier friends when you don't look good? For telling us about your bad day, or admitting you suck at your job, or telling us that you have no life? Frankly, if you don't try to impress people, you succeed...at not impressing them.

    So shine on, you Botoxed, Photoshopped, bland, right-down-the-middle star. You had the right idea, and those of us who embraced reality a little too tightly should be following your example. Time for me to write more statuses about hurt puppies, cute children, and pretty sunsets!

    Edit: I think I need to give some inspiration credit to @oxlorixo 's latest post, to @weedorwildflower for various discussions we've had on facebookland, and to @jennz_08 for having the most awkward FB ever. Awkward.

Comments (21)

  • Facebook - Be as fake as you can stand!  Good advice.

  • Hey, I just came back from saving a bunch of puppies from a burning building while fighting evil princess-snatching terrorist syndicates. 

    I have to say, there's a lot of truth in your post about being pixel-perfect. However, I think in some cases that it has more to do with keeping a positive outlook on life by focusing on the good events, instead of presenting a side that everyone wants to see, just for the sake of impressing people. 

    I do think people can exaggerate and embellish stories sometimes. It's good to keep an eye out for such folks as they can sometimes be unstable. 

    Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to teach Chuck Norris the art of manliness while I fight off the hordes of admiring females who love my latest triple-platinum album titled, "Once you go QuantumStorm you'll wish your boyfriend was never born". 

  • @QuantumStorm - A+ comment. I know my post was quite cynical, but I felt like it fit well with the series. Naturally my next post will wildly sway in a different direction!

  • You know to many people on Facebook (such as people you work with) who are too close but not close enought to be honest with

  • I don't really seem to get the same experience others have. I think cause I'm from a small town but people are more real. It's the stupidity on Facebook that astounds me. ha ha. I can put up with pretty faces, but I want them to stop telling me how much they "hate immagrents thay shuld go back to there cuntry."

  • haha good point. I mean its easy to criticize someone for not being "real" on a site like facebook, but then again facebook has become more of a place to show off and put your best face forward rather than socialize with people you actually care about... you raised a really interesting point, here! :)

  • I've enjoyed our convos on FB, too. As for this post, I agree...but... I hate when people are all negative about their life on FB. I can't stand when they "go off." I don't like when they share overly personal things. There's a guy I grew up with (at church) and he was sharing WAAY too much when he was going through a divorce. Ken and I still make fun of him (I know, rude and inconsiderate) and his status update one time about two years ago that read, "Sometimes I just want someone to hold me."

    In fact, tonight when Ken got home from work, Jackson didn't want Ken to put him down. He cried every time Ken tried. Finally, Ken came over to me and said, "Well, Jack and Greg F. have something in common." I said, "Let me guess... they both want to be held?"

    All that to say, FB is not a place to share raw emotions that you might someday want to take back. Oh, and I also don't like ugly pictures. When people tag an ugly picture of me, I promptly untag it. Unless I was in junior high or something, I just think it's rude.

  • I think facebook is hillarious.  I take it as a big joke.  My updates are random and have absolutely nothing to do with anything.

  • I could care less what people do or say on their Facebook. I like to keep my life separate from the world so there's really not much my friends can see on it.

  • LOL. There was a time Facebook was a place you could be free to express your emotions. But now because it's so public people are more wary. I mean even complaining about a job is something that can get you in trouble!  Or talking about divorce can be a problem in court! So in general Facebook should be used to keep in contact with others who you haven't talk to in years to share good, bland, wholesome news. LOL

  • I concur. Sometimes i think facebook is high school all over again.

  • @theasianwithnoname -  The problems pointed out here are exactly why I'm not on Facebook period.

  • Ha, I might try to impress people with my photos but that's about it. My facebook is really boring too. I only ever seem to update my facebook status when I'm really annoyed about something which only happens about once a week. I post pictures occasionally when my niece or nephew do something cute and that's about the end of my update. 

  • You know... this could be the very reason I started doing next to nothing with FB.  Good thoughts.

  • Hey - those candid photos take forever to get right. :P

  • This really makes me want Jennz FB.

  • people have died trying to be this awkward.

  • lol one of the many reasons i am not apart of the facebook world !

  • I don't really post a lot on my facebook, except some pictures sometimes. I have too many friends, and it intimidates me to know so many people can read what I write on there. And I've tried deleting people, but then people notice and add me back the next day and it's awkward.

  • I comcur -Good for you

    You can see my -woke up- looking- like- crap pic anytime you want a good laugh

    Or start to take me too seriously.

    But use sparingly. I know I do.

  • I think the issue is that Facebook's becoming a digital account of your life.  (Timeline anyone???)  Along with that, most employers check it for job applicants... or, if you have a job, coworkers who you may not be BFF with might add you.  Of course, you can deny the friendship and then it may become awkward between you two at work, but that's a whole 'nother story.  Or how about those old high school classmates?  Do you want some photo of you on there looking like ass?  Do you want potential employers or coworkers or old classmates to see some status update about how you hate the world today?  Facebook is a front.  Many people want to put their best foot forward, perhaps slightly enhancing their situation with attractive photos and positive status updates, choosing to leave out the negative.  Of course, others will use it to do more than enhance -- they'll over-exaggerate their situation... I think we all know who those people are.

    Personally, I post status updates typically once every few weeks - most are about neutral subjects.  And when it comes to photos, I certainly don't put up the ones that I look like crap in.  I don't know anyone who does that.  I think of it like this: Facebook is like your billboard to the world.  How do you want others to look or think of you?  I know that may sound shallow, but I can't think of any other analogies right now.

    Holy sh!t this is getting long.  My bad.

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