I've officially succumbed to the oldest bandwagon on Xanga. I'll answer your questions via Q & A to celebrate getting my new laptop. 

Go for it. 

Normally, blogging is a joy for me. It helps me a lot to translate what is on my mind and my heart into a blog. Yes, often I don't share what's really bothering me, but it still helps to share something. 

A friend recently told me about a promising investment opportunity in a start-up. I invested in it, and tried to forget about it afterward. Then we got a newsletter update that the company was progressing nicely, so I decided to invest a little more, bringing my investment to HAHAHA LIKE I WOULD TELL YOU dollars.

Anyway, my friend's excitement is contagious, and he likes to tease me a bit by saying "What are we going to do with all our money?" and "But what if we only make a measly $200,000 or $300,000?" I laugh at him and assume a much more moderate return. Frankly, we could lose all our money, and I'm pessimistically prepared for that outcome. But in the last few days, we got a bit serious about it all. What if the sale of the start-up does indeed return 5X or more on our original investment?

It's actually a bit intimidating to think about what my life would be like if I were moderately rich. Some interesting questions for you to ponder with me. Let's suppose, wild optimism alert, that you came into $500,000. It's not enough to quit working forever, but certainly enough to be upper middle-class.
1) Would you quit your job to do something else? As much as I like writing or other hobbies, they are hobbies for a reason. I'd hate Xanga if it were my job.
2) Would you keep it a secret? I think I would, to be honest. But also...
3) Would you make an irrational purchase? It would be tempting to buy a much nicer car or house, but then, once you start that, you'll quickly burn through the $500,000. Can't be sitting in a Cadillac while wearing Wal-Mart clothes, etc.
4) What would you do about people who only liked you for your money? Especially for men, money is a status symbol. But would I be brave enough to say "If there's any chance you like me for my money, go away?" Most of us are indeed the Prodigal Son, quick to spend our inheritance on strumpets and con men.
5) What about the increased temptation to be a fool? Sure, park in the handicapped zone: you can afford the ticket. Go to the casinos and burn through $5000, you got $495,000 more, at least for now. There are plenty of quasi-legal ways for a rich person to pay for sexual pleasure. Strangely enough, money opens up a whole new world of temptations, with only the ability to give more to the poor added to you.

Just some thoughts...I should know in a month what happens.

If your lover fails to drop a bad habit for your sake, does that mean they don't love you?

It was a hot day, and inside the volleyball complex, the large fans seemed to do little. We had just lost another game, which wasn't that unusual or upsetting. Our hustle player took a seat: you know the type, the short but energetic guy who at the end of games has his uniform dirty from sliding on wood, grass, or sand. And suddenly, he was out. We called his name, slapped his face, but he wasn't responding. I went to call 911...

I went to Atlanta recently, and posted photos of my trip. Those two events have a stronger inverse casual relationship than you might assume. I posted photos, because I went on the trip. But did I go on the trip, because I could post photos?

Five years ago, I started posting a little more photo and video, first on Xanga, then everywhere. I became more aware of what people enjoy and appreciate. I'm not 20 anymore, and I'm not on Myspace. My age group doesn't litter our Facebook feed with (cringe) #selfies. But, we do seem to take way too much time photographing things we bought, or things we can do because we have money. XangaGramBook tempts us to show off. Should you buy that dress? Yes...if it means 30 Facebook likes and 10 comments, including HIS comment. Should you spend $100 to go to that football game, bro? Yes...if you can take the same dumb "LOOK AT ME, AND THE FIELD BEHIND ME!" shots as everyone else. Don't watch the game, watch the TV camera, and wave like you just don't care when it is pointed at you. It's all about the Face Time!

I don't know why I'm writing about this, there are umpteen more important problems in the world. But I feel this puts unfair pressure on our poor friends. Sorry you can't post any photos, you didn't leave home or buy anything new! And am I really living in the moment of being in Atlanta if I'm taking pictures more for the fans back home? It was all worth it though, guys. A full 1/64th of my Facebook friends list liked the album! And the total number of comments on the 16 Atlanta pics I posted was 6 or so--that's, like, .4 comments per photo! ...ok, I rounded up the number. Caught me.

This post is a waste of time of a waste of time, but I hope that made sense. Now do the right thing and go leave me lots of comments and views on the Atlanta photos, before I start taking #selfies of myself in the bathroom mirror with the dirty stack of laundry behind me. You've been warned.

Suppose that you go out on a date. The man/woman understands your personality immediately. They have a good grasp of your strengths and weaknesses, your wants and needs, and the way you think. I'll go a little further and say that this person is a decent human being and is interested in dating you. You are fairly certain they won't use this knowledge against you in an evil way, but of course they do know better how to ask you for things or to convince you. Assume slightly above-average looks, earnings, status, etc. for this date.

On the one hand, this person understands you so well already. You've just saved yourself months of awkward explanations, easily avoidable arguments, and embarrassing misunderstandings. They know what you like.

On the other hand, this means no mysteries and no illusions. The honeymoon period of the relationship won't be the same. They already recognized your jealous side, or your selfishness, or your tendency to be needy. They know what you are not.

Will you enter into a relationship with this person? You have to decide now, after this first date.

Via @carolinavenger, a survey:

It's been far too long since a survey has swept through Xanga like the swine flu. I have an inkling that this is because surveys used to be lifted wholesale from myspace and myspace is dead- and no one on tumblr has the attention span for a whole survey. Since I have nothing better to blog about, I'm going to make one up. Since you have nothing better to blog about, you should take it.

1. Who is your most favorite author? ("I don't read" is not an acceptable answer)

I'm going to say Lloyd Alexander today. His Prydain Chronicles mean something different to me each time I read them. I name my laptops after characters in his books...I have issues.

2. Theist, deist, agnostic, atheist, or apatheist?

Theist.

3. Android, iOS, Windows Phone, Blackberry, Palm, or dumbphone?

Android: although I have been winking at Windows Phone and Blackberry of late. I'm not very faithful when it comes to technology.

4. What language would you most like to learn?

Hebrew? or Russian.  Both countries have long histories of suffering and excellent literature. Would love to read it all in the original languages.

5. Your favorite song right now? Because I am a terrible person: Click it

6. Your favorite song of all time? Ugh asking for people's favorites is so unfair! ...which is why I do it all the time. Fair is fair. You'll be unimpressed.

7. What's the #1 most important quality you look for in the opposite sex (or the same sex, if applicable?)

I can forgive much to a curious, playful mind. That's probably not #1 overall but all these demanding FIND YOUR FAVORITE questions are intimidating. Also, if you think about it, I have strong incentive not to reveal my #1. Heh.

8. What otherwise common thing have you never experienced?

I thought of a good one, but was overcome by diabolical laughter. Let's say never smoked?

9. Favorite place on the internet besides Xanga?

Probably Grantland.com. Social networking wise, I guess it's...Facebook? eww.

10. What question would you most like to be asked?

How can I help you?

The Five Love Languages is one of my favorite personality tests, because it helps us realize that we all have different ways of giving and receiving love. This graphic via helps show them all:

But what if you don't have a romantic lover? Oftentimes we put up with bad romance rather than have none at all. But here's my ideas on how to fill your love needs without having to rely on a lover, ranked in order of difficulty:
1. Quality Time. If you have this love language, you can fill some of your romantic needs by having close friendships and by investing in the same locations and organizations. You and your friends go out every Thursday for 3 hours, or you sing karaoke at the same place each Saturday. The familiarity and dependability may help.
2. Words of Affirmation. As long as you are good at something, and people will give you praise, you can still get a lot of words of affirmation. You're a photographer? post photos on Instagram and revel in your likes. Or hear the praises of your teammates as you lead your volleyball team to victory. I sometimes think words of affirmation people turn into workaholics, because work is one easy way to get words of praise.
3. Receiving Gifts. This is where it starts getting tricky, from a platonic perspective. You can buy yourself gifts. Or you can exchange gifts with friends, using reciprocity to get what you need. I should also state, I think this is where female friendships are much better than male friendships, as men don't really get gifts for each other.
4. Acts of Service. A strong family relationship can be very helpful here, as family members sacrifice for each other. Or, you can enter into volunteering with others, and they volunteer with you. Sometimes guys are good at this one for each other, as there's that idea of sacrificing/working for the gang and being teammates.
5. Physical Touch. To me, this is the hardest one to get from platonic friendships. I guess you can befriend Euros and Latinos who love to greet with hugs and kisses and are more likely to be comfortable with less space. Or you can buy massages and frequent spas. Another option is to engage in physical activities that encourage/emphasize physical contact.

Thoughts? I think sometimes we look down on certain people for their romantic choices. But if their love language is physical touch, and they thrive on physical affection, it's a lot harder for them to get that from friends than it is for you to get, say, words of affirmation. So keep that in mind...everyone's ease of satisfaction with being single is different.

So, fellow men, let's walk into the coffee shop together. As you walk in, a woman looks up from her book, smiles, and then looks down at her book again. She totally wants you to go talk to her, right?

Sadly, you're probably wrong. Women smile more than men do. She's probably smiling about something she read in the book, or your funny hat. But it probably isn't a smile because you're so attractive. In fact, according to studies, men are so illiterate in body language, even if she does find you attractive, you wouldn't pick up on her signals!

"Men were more likely than women to miscategorize afriendly-looking woman as indicating sexual interest,but—crucially—they also flunked out when it came to recognizing photosshowing sexual interest: men were more likely than women to misidentifysexually interested targets as merely friendly, by 37.8% vs. 31.9%. Inshort, “men were more likely than women to misperceive friendliness assexual interest, but they also were quite likely to misperceive sexualinterest as friendliness,” the scientists found. “Men weresignificantly less sensitive to the distinction between friendlinessand sexual interest”—in both directions, since they couldn’t tell whenwomen were sad as opposed to rejecting, either.”

If you would, taste the irony with me. A friendly, easy-going, smiling women is likely to attract a plethora of men who are sure that she sexually desires them just because she smiles in their general direction. And then men wonder why some women are so cold...it's the only way to avoid men from misreading friendliness!

So smiling is one signal that guys misread as sexual interest. What are some of the others?