I was watching coverage of the Amtrak engineer who may have caused the crash near Philadelphia. CNN teased the upcoming story as "An Interview with a Friend and Co-Worker." The coverage of said engineer had been quite negative. I cringed as I ran on the treadmill, my eyes on the screen. "Here we go, this so-called friend is going to come on and bash him too. This always gets so sleazy when they think someone's guilty..."

But no, the friend and colleague went on CNN and proclaimed his confidence in the engineer. He said the engineer did all the right safety checks. He praised his friend as a good worker. This friend put his own reputation on the line to defend the engineer.

I was touched, and honestly I wished that friend was my friend. What a testimony of true friendship! And it made me wonder... If you were accused of something, would I talk to the local paper to support you? Would I be willing to go on CNN for you? Or would I remain silent? We live in a world where everyone wants to come to judgment quickly. We make up our minds rapidly based on convincing Internet articles and news stories. Are you or I willing to stand up for each other when the frothing media or local gossips attack? After all, the engineer may truly be guilty of negligence in the end. But it's just something to think about.

So once again I'll be trying to drive around the area when I have free time If you're north of Virginia and east of Indiana, by all means let me know, will try to make it work. What are your summer plans?

I was reading the story of Joan of Arc a few days ago. It truly seems to be a perfect proof for God's presence in history, right? It's extremely well-documented by Middle Age standards. It has verifiable facts. Yes, Joan of Arc definitely had something or someone on her side of non-human power, right? But then, if you track supernatural power throughout history, you get some odd stories...

Think of the Children's Crusade. Children thought they saw in a vision that they were supposed to go to Jerusalem, and the Arabs would hand back the city to Christians. Thousands of children perished in the effort. Doesn't seem like they heard God...

Or think of Nat Turner, the oppressed slave who led a violent uprising in the US. He too claimed to hear the voice of God, and seemed to have contact with something divine. Yet the voice seems to have led him to kill and burn, until he and his followers were caught and killed.

Finally, as for non-Christians with super powers, think of the great Indian leader Tecumseh. He literally prophesied an earthquake. Not even modern science can do that. It's hard not to think that he too had some supernatural assistance. How? Why? Whom? Was God on Tecumseh's side, to drive out the murderous white man? Chew over that thought, heh.

I think that as a Christian and history lover, there's no question that God participates in the affairs of men on some level. However, trying to figure out his purpose, or the exact way in which some participants in history tap into what are verifiable superpowers, is a bit beyond us humans. But it's interesting food for thought, no?

Yes, soon enough it's my birthday! I'm looking forward to it. It's a long story, but I'm finally starting to feel happy and at peace. I'm not sure if it was the move, or some life changes, but ever since December 2014 I've felt a lot better about life. I don't know how obvious it was how New York at times was hard on me; how living there was ultimately not good for me. But I feel much better living in Pennsylvania. Just because, here's some random Xanga-related photos from the Summer 2010 meetup:

Was at the gym today, when I saw another terrifying ISIS headline. I've been reading a bit about ISIS. They represent a radical, literal version of Islam. There have been attempts to destabilize them by claiming that ISIS are not true Muslims. It would be nice, of course, to isolate ISIS as Muslim frauds and have them shunned by all. But is that feasible?

Take for example that gym workout. Let's suppose that I run into someone that claims that I should lift weight 7 days a week. "Never take a rest day, bro! Just lift all the time! Do you want to be strong or not?!" Now, if I only lift 4, I look lazy compared to him. He seems to be more dedicated to weightlifting than I am. So I will appear as a weaker lifter even if my strategy is more scientific. My only hope to "expose" him as weightlifting incorrectly is for him to break down (tear a muscle) or to be weaker than me.

Or suppose I, as a Christian, was trying to reason with one of the 2nd century Christian extremists. "Christ told us to deny the world and be sexually pure!" he'd say. And I'd nod my head uneasily...I can't disagree with that. He's right. Then minutes later, he tells me he castrated himself, quotes Bible verses out of context, and demands to know why I haven't castrated myself, if I am going to be single and prone to sinning sexually. Obviously I don't love God and hate sin as much as he does!

See where this is going? I'm concerned that it's very hard to denounce ISIS as not being Muslim, and such efforts will fail.

I can be surprisingly out of touch with my feelings. So perhaps it's not surprising that it took 6 months after moving out of New York to realize how frustrating my time there had been. I had a moment where I truly felt loss. I realized how I had gone to New York young, eager to mature and succeed and help others, and I left old, less mature, and cynical.

Why am I sharing this? I think it's difficult for some of us (ok, mostly men) to get in touch with our feelings. My one friend would always challenge me that New York was having a negative effect on me. But I liked the job and the money, and I kept hoping it would turn around, that things would get better. Now, however, I see more clearly how it wore me down over time.

I Corinthians talks about how Faith, Hope, and Love abide. I can see how those three started faltering in my time in New York. God is still good. Many people are still wonderfully kind and thoughtful. I think it's just painful to have a moment where the true weight of loss finally hits you. Sigh.

My parents have by and large been decent parents. But they did not handle my transition to adulthood well. I had great grades and we were comfortably middle class. They decided I should attend local school X (which was a glorified community college) rather than a farther away school that would have fit my interests. They pushed me to study engineering instead of my admittedly scattered hopes of something in the liberal arts or maybe a history teacher.

I found myself commuting 30 minutes a day to a school where most were from area high schools that I hadn't attended. The school was friendlier than most (shout-out to Midwest niceness), but I still felt rather isolated.

My point? You could make a good case my parents messed me up. But...it all worked out in the end. I graduated with zero student loans. I had some amazing teachers. And I was accepted at the graduate schools of my choice.

Why am I telling this story? It's not "if" your parents will ruin your life, it's when. (I could also tell a story on how they did a great job dealing with me from 11-14 when I was a weird kid.) Even the best parents will misjudge you or hurt you. Expect it, but also know that you don't have to stay ruined. My relationship with my parents survived those weak years, and soon after had some of its strongest years. Just a thought.

I was once close friends with a guy who lived in my hometown. He moved away to Washington state. We sadly had a big argument about a year after he moved. We slightly patched it up, but scars remain.

His wedding is this winter. I'm wondering if I should go or not. You've been there too, right? Calculating what fading loyalties are worth?

On the one hand, I find that all my friendships get worse after the person gets married. If I go, I'm merely doing something nice, politely putting dirt over the already cold grave of our friendship. Also, I was deeply offended by our falling out.

But on the other hand...he used to mean something. His friendship helped get me out of my lowest low in my life. No, I don't truly owe him anything. But to see him get happily married would be nice. Plus, our mutual friend will also be there, lessening the chances of any blowup.

Heh. Yay dilemmas. The dilemmas are the same throughout life, only the ages and settings change.

So which is it, do you miss her or do you miss the man you were when you were with her? Asking for a fiend, err, friend.